What defines a leader?
More importantly, what defines a good leader? A leader who is respected and is someone others want to follow.
A leader is someone who understands the needs and wants of their “group,” can see the bigger picture, and acts in a way that is best for the group (not necessarily for themselves). Through these actions, they earn the group’s respect, and they earn the leadership position.
Leadership is talked about a lot in dog ownership. For a long time, I personally was turned off by the term “Leadership” and have marinated on the topic for a long time before defining it in a way that makes sense to me. I have found the issue I was having was not in the term or the concept of being your dog’s leader- after all, this is a human world, and we need to help our dogs navigate it safely. The issue was in how I witnessed others interpreting leadership. The mentality of teaching the dog they do what I say because “I am the leader and I said so,” didn’t sit right with me. In that way of thinking, the “group” did not elect the owner/handler to be the leader, the owner elected themselves. In my opinion, that is not true leadership. That is leadership based on ego. You must understand who your dog is, what they need (to feel safe, secure, happy, and satisfied), and fulfill their needs and purpose regularly to earn the leadership title.
What can you do to earn that leadership position?
Understand basic body language: This is how dogs communicate! We must first listen to them before expecting them to listen to us. There’s a lot of free info online about body language, and here are some of the basics:
Wide eyes, turning/leaning away, lip licking, ears back, tail down = nervous dog. Give them space. Bite possible. (dog may only be showing one of these cues, and it may be subtle. Listen!)
Hard eyes, hard mouth, growl, stiff body = nervous and/or aggressive dog, likely to bite.
Relaxed mouth, almond shaped relaxed eyes, spine and tail curvy = relaxed/happy/content dog
Fulfillment: Dogs are considered predators. This means we need to incorporate the predation cycle into our dogs’ daily lives. The predation cycle is orient/explore/search-eye-stalk-chase-make contact (likely bite)-kill-dissect-consume-rest/recover. Daily exercise and play should mimic this cycle, and YOU need to be part of the fun. Here are some suggestions:
Hiking and sniffaris
Hide and seek (in the woods/outside ideal)
Flirt pole
Tug (let them win, and see if they’ll chase you while carrying the toy!)
Chew bones daily (raw marrow bones are great!)
Create a digging pit
Overcoming obstacles (climb playground equipment, walking across a tree log/something that resembles a balance beam, resistance feeding)
Crate/place time daily to ensure proper rest and recovery. Rest and recovery are so important for both you and your dog! Make sure you’re taking care of this need for both of you!
Working purpose: What was your dog bred to do? Do you notice any apparent working traits surfacing? So many dogs need to do hard work and aren’t being challenged enough in their daily life, which can create unwanted behaviors. For example, herding dogs often circle and nip at people/kids’ heels. Families often feel their dog is being aggressive, but it may be likely that this dog needs a more appropriate outlet for herding. Here are a few ideas you can try (find professionals in your area that specialize in these activities).
Bite work (protection dogs + dogs with bite history/at risk of biting)
Aggressive dog owners- for more info on how bite work can help your dog, feel free to contact our mentors (both will consult remotely if you are not in their area)
Leah Lykos: Caninemovementlab.com
Ben Draper: Wildheartdogtraining.com
Resistance training (resistance feeding + weight pulling/pulling sports)
Herding ball, do not need to work with a trainer (collieball.com, not a sponsored link, we just love the product!)
Scent work
Agility
Hunting (Pointers, Setters, Spaniels, Hounds, Retrievers)
Diet: We are responsible for our dogs' health and wellness, which starts with diet. Again, dogs are predators. Left to their own devises, they eat a primarily carnivore diet. The best possible diet for a dog is whole foods, animal based (aka meat, organs, and bones). I know most people want to feed kibble or canned food because it is cheaper and convenient. Those are highly processed and NO living being thrives on a processed diet. Think about us humans on processed diets. Our physical and mental health as a society is worse than ever. When we eat whole foods and cut out the processed food, we feel great! We're not as moody and our bodies feel great. Dogs are no different, and behavioral issues can be reduced just by changing diet. Do your best with your budget. Buy meat on sale and supplement regularly if a processed diet is what works best for you now.
Set boundaries: No healthy relationship is boundary-free. Setting boundaries in the relationships in your life builds your confidence, sense of self, independence, and helps support mental and physical health. Our relationship with our dogs is no different. Using routine and structure in daily life is a great way to set healthy boundaries and maximize your relationship with your dog! What does this look like?
Give your dog an assigned seat in each room of your house. Constantly being next to you and within your personal bubble everywhere you go (especially on the couch and in bed!) creates a co-dependent relationship.
Make time for purposeful affection. Take at least 10 minutes each day to sit with your dog and massage them. This can really help anyone who wants their dog on the couch and in bed with them for their own comfort. We all love our dogs and want to have intimate time with them, so let’s make it purposeful!
Set up management indoors to prevent unwanted behaviors from developing and/or being rehearsed. Use crates, gates, pens, and tethers until your training has advanced enough that your dog has a clear understanding of how to behave indoors, and has shown they can make the right choice when an opportunity presents itself (ex. not barking out the window when someone pulls into the driveway, staying inside when a door is left open, not jumping on the table to grab unattended food, staying calm and silent when they would otherwise demand bark).
Advocate for them and their space. If your dog is unsure/nervous/reactive towards people or other dogs, protect their space. This is the first step in helping them find trust and security in situations they feel uncomfortable in.
Make time for yourself!! Both to decompress and have fun! You must take care of yourself before you can effectively take care of others.
Give these tips a try and let us know what impact they have on your relationship with your dog!
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